One of the questions that comes up time and again is how do we safeguard our children from being exposed to drugs and pro drug use content on the Internet?

Most parents are already attuned to risks on the web like online predators and sexual content. Increasingly, sites that promote illicit drug use — actually explaining which drugs to use and how to do it — are coming to the attention of parents as their children are exposed.  What’s more, rogue online pharmacies and their e-mail spam promote painkillers and other drugs to teens with “no prescription needed” while blogs and teen content portray drug and alcohol abuse as no big deal.

Our colleagues at the Treatment Research Institute in Philadelphia have been studying the growth of these sites.  They came away so worried about the scale and scope that they’ve invited us to partner with them and an Internet developer to launch a new online platform called WebSafe Parent available at www.websafeparent.com

WebSafe will be an online community educating adults about this content and how their children are exposed to it.  WebSafe will also provide (More…)

• 	Posted by: Steve Pasierb | 3 Comment(s)
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We all lie.  For parents, it is important to tell if their teens are lying.  After watching and interacting with thousands of teens, parents and families, I’ve compiled a list of clues for adults, teachers and parents to look out for:

(Disclaimer: the following is list of observations and does not always mean that the person you are speaking with is lying)

Verbal Cues
* Timing is off between (More…)

• 	Posted by: Vanessa Van Petten | 2 Comment(s)
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Last night I tried to teach my mom (love you!) how to download a song onto her iPod.  It was a nightmare.  Not just because I had to explain the concept of an iPod (and of downloading — at least music she understood), but also because of her fear and self-doubt that came along with it. Because I am a professional blogger, I teach people and companies about the Internet, technology and social networking all the time.  I have come to realize that sometimes grown-ups are virtual kids and kids are virtual grown-ups!

Why I Think Adults are Virtually Immature and Kids are Virtually Grown-Up:

1) Learning to use a social network, such as Facebook, is like learning to ride a bike. If you learn it as a child, you are fearless, you try everything, it comes naturally and you have time to practice.  But if you learn as an adult (I am still trying to learn how to ride a bike, so I know), it is scary.  (More…)

• 	Posted by: Vanessa Van Petten | 0 Comment(s)
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Something I see a lot of in my field is the classic (and fraudulent) tactical mistake parents too often make when disciplining their teens. This tactic takes on features that are Ponzi-like in the realm of parenting, which is why I call this strategy “Ponzi Parenting.”

As I’m sure most of you know, in the financial world, a Ponzi scheme is a scam that aims for short-term gain instead of long-term success, setting off a whole series of bad behaviors. Similarly, “Ponzi Parents” try to please their kids — and make life easier for themselves — in the short term, without worrying about larger, and possibly lifelong, negative consequences.

The main theme of the error is that when parents discipline for the moment and get in the habit of choosing the easy way out, they bank on the short-term gain of pleasing their child and on the hope of avoiding conflict. But keeping children happy doesn’t necessarily mean (More…)

• 	Posted by: Ken Winters, Ph.D. | 1 Comment(s)
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Just read mommy blogger Lisa Belkin’s article in the New York Times Magazine entitled “Let the Kid Be.”

Let the kid be? What does this mean exactly?

Here at the Partnership, we believe in creating and maintaining a strong bond with one’s teen. Parents need to stay involved, keep an ongoing dialogue with their kids, and know their whereabouts, their friends, their school habits and their online activities.

But Belkin brings up some good food for thought – at what point does concerned, involved parenting actually become helicopter parenting (or “I-am-never-going-to-let-my-kid-out-of-my-sight parenting,” as Belkin jokingly calls it)?

Maybe, as this article suggests, just “chilling” is the smartest thing we can do as moms and dads. We’ll be less stressed and fearful of parental failure, our kids will feel less stifled, and we may even save some cash in these tight economic times. But, on the other hand – can you really ever be over-involved as a parent? After all, it’s our job (and our instinct) to help and protect our kids.

What do you think? When does protecting become overprotecting? Where do you draw the line between good parenting and helicopter parenting – or do you not draw a line at all?

• 	Posted by: Joe Keenan | 3 Comment(s)
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A new service from Google may help parents monitor their kids.

“With an upgrade to its mobile maps, Google Inc. hopes to prove it can track people on the go as effectively as it searches for information on the Internet.The new software to be released Wednesday will enable people with mobile phones and other wireless devices to automatically share their whereabouts with family and friends.
The feature, dubbed ‘Latitude,’ expands upon a tool introduced in 2007 to allow mobile phone users to check their own location on a Google map with the press of a button. ‘This adds a social flavor to Google maps and makes it more fun,’ said Steve Lee, a Google product manager.”

More from Yahoo Tech.

• 	Posted by: Joe Keenan | 0 Comment(s)
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I was absolutely floored last week when my son mentioned he’d given out his cell phone number on the internet. We’d recently had the conversation about the dangers lurking on the web when I presented a program on internet safety to our middle school — so my brain couldn’t wrap itself around the fact that he blatantly went against the number one rule in our house for using the internet: NO PERSONAL INFORMATION is to be given out for ANY reason!

I was furious. I raised my voice in a manner reserved for serious offenses and felt panic well up inside my body.  What would have possessed him to be so careless?  What part of “grooming” (a term we’d discussed) did he not understand? (Grooming is when a predator will pretend to be whatever sex or age he needs to be in order to lure a child into trusting him so the child will reveal personal information.)  I took a deep breath and sat my son down for a long talk about how serious this situation could be.

This time, I was very specific about what can happen when personal information is revealed to someone he doesn’t know.  He was in a popular game room for younger children and told me he knew this person was a girl his age from England.  I asked him, “How do you know she is from England?”

“She told me she is.  She gave me her phone number too.”

“You didn’t call or text her, did you?”

(More…)

• 	Posted by: Tara Paterson | 3 Comment(s)
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Earlier this week, the Partnership released a survey with MetLife Foundation showing that one in four teens would prefer to talk to their parents about drugs and alcohol by using email or their cell phones. Meantime, only three percent of parents want to discuss these subjects by cell or email. I don’t blame them — this is an important issue, and if we’re having anything other than in-person discussions about it, we miss out on that gratifying flicker of recognition that crosses our teens’ faces (after they cross their arms and roll their eyes) that lets us know they hear us, that we’ve made contact.

Nonetheless, the study makes an important point — our teens are part of “Generation Text,” and if we don’t get on board with these up-to-the-minute forms of keeping in touch, we may miss out on everyday opportunities to connect with our kids. While nothing takes the place of a face-to-face update — even if it’s for two minutes as your kid scarfs down an Eggo and runs to school. If you’ve had a tough time talking about drugs and alcohol, sending a text or an email may help break the ice and open the door for a future chat. And if your teen feels more comfortable emailing you about what goes on at school parties or what his friends are up to, be grateful he’s confiding in you, and keep up your end of the email exchange until he’s ready to talk.

Do you email or text with your kids? Do you find it’s helped to break the ice on tough subjects?

• 	Posted by: Joe Keenan | 4 Comment(s)
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I’ve noticed a bit of a trend over the past several months.  In talking with parents, and especially folks in the news media who are parents, they seem to be more and more attuned to issues like online predators and sexual content on the web that place their kids at risk.  They also see all the spam their own in-boxes hawking prescription drugs online.  They know talking with their kids about all this is important.

When I raise the issue of also guarding against their kids being exposed to online drug content, pro-drug use websites and literally instructive “how to” videos on binge drinking and drug use that popping up across the net, there is a level of disbelief that’s remarkable.  Sex they know. Bad guys they get.  Yet the idea that there are people out there promoting drug abuse to their kids, showing them how in exacting detail, celebrating being wrecked, just seems a degree too far out.   “That CAN’T be possible!”  “That CAN’T be legal?”  “WHO would be that stupid?” Sorry…

Nielsen Online recently did a study that looked at video streams viewed online by a sample of 13 to 18 year olds across the country.  In June 2008 alone, nearly one million teens viewed online videos promoting alcohol and drug use.  The folks at the Center for Substance Abuse Research at the University of Maryland sum up the data this way, “Of the 1.2 million substance-related videos viewed by teens, 39% portrayed explicit use of alcohol or other drugs and/or intoxication. In addition, the majority (85%) of these videos had comments posted that promoted substance use. The survey also found that more than one-third (35%) of viewers of all substance-related videos were younger than 16, and females were more likely than males to watch these videos (57% vs. 43%).”

So, as a parent or caring adult, what do we do?  We have to realize that for all of the greatness and richness brought to our lives via the web, there is also the potential for harm.  Practical tips include:  1) Be clear and consistent with your kids about what online content is out of bounds.  2) Be familiar with the digital devices and web tools your kids use.  3) Keep computers in common areas of your home — family room or other central location — and limit the time your kids spend online.  4) Visit your teen’s personal blog, web site, favorite social networking sites or other postings.  5) Pay attention to the history, cookies and other tracking on your computer.

These are by no means all of the potential courses a parent can take, but the essential fact is that your child can be and is exposed to an extraordinary volume of pro-drinking, pro-drugging content on the web.  Monitoring your child plays a key role.  We need to both know and accept this is happening right now. With that knowledge we can each begin to take our own steps to safeguard our children.

What are your tips for protecting kids from dangerous online content?

• 	Posted by: Steve Pasierb | 3 Comment(s)
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