As a father of two teens, I know it’s impossible to shield our kids from messages that promote underage drinking. That said, it’s always nice to be given a heads-up so we know just who and what in pop culture may be negatively influencing our kids – and right now in particular, I think you’ll be surprised to find out some of the sources sending pro-drinking messages to our teenagers. Here’s a quick round-up of where our kids have been seeing and hearing “cool” alcohol-related messages lately:

Tweens and younger teens: The latest Harry Potter movie. If you think I’m kidding, check out this article from the New York Times, which cites a number of scenes in which our favorite young wizards, only about 16, drink “butterbeer” and appear to get drunk.

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• 	Posted by: Joe Keenan | 6 Comment(s)
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At long last a simple online tool to help decode text messages: http://www.lgdtxtr.com/

• 	Posted by: Joe Keenan | 2 Comment(s)
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Recently, we had a scary incident occur at school for our 12-year-old son, Adam, that merits sharing.

At the beginning of the school year, Adam’s first year in middle school, he befriended a boy I wasn’t completely comfortable with for various reasons (we’ll call the boy Joe). Adam, a kid with a big heart who befriends just about everyone, genuinely liked Joe and hung out with him. I remained cautious, but allowed him to invite Joe over from time to time. I shared my concern and how I felt about Joe with Adam, but it was hard to argue with my son because he truly liked this child and didn’t have any real reason not to.

Then, months went by and we didn’t see Joe. I asked Adam about it and he said he didn’t feel comfortable around him anymore. I wasn’t about to argue with him since I was uncomfortable around him as well, but felt better knowing Adam could sense something wasn’t right.
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• 	Posted by: Tara Paterson | 2 Comment(s)
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Yesterday I posted a great article on just how much teens are texting these days (hint: it’s even more than you think). So it may be hard to believe that while our kids are so steeped in their own little virtual worlds, they are actually hugging and non-sexually touching each other more than ever! In fact, gratuitous hugging has become so common and disruptive lately that many middle and high schools around the country are actually banning this seemingly innocent gesture. In this article from the New York Times, Sarah Kershaw explores all the ins and outs of the new teenage hug.

So, what’s your take on all this? By banning hugging, are we making it even harder for the Facebook and Twitter generation to develop genuine human bonds? Or do you think teens right now are creeping into dangerous—or at least uncomfortable—territory? (For more perspective, see what our guest blogger Vanessa has to say here.)

• 	Posted by: Joe Keenan | 2 Comment(s)
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Sexting, the act of sending suggestive electronic text and/or picture messages, is something parents must be aware of – and talk to their kids about.   If your child has a cell phone and is 10 or above, you need to have this conversation with them.  Check out the facts below — and the related links – for facts and tips on talking:

How many young adults are sending or posting nude or semi-nude images of themselves?
33% of young adults overall
36% of young adult women
31% of young adult men

How many teens say they have sent/posted nude or semi-nude pictures or video of themselves?
20% of teens overall
22% of teen girls
18% of teen boys
11% of young teen girls (ages 13-16)

Sexually suggestive messages (text, email, IM) are even more prevalent than sexually suggestive images. How many teens are sending or posting sexually suggestive messages?
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• 	Posted by: Vanessa Van Petten | 0 Comment(s)
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A new service from Google may help parents monitor their kids.

“With an upgrade to its mobile maps, Google Inc. hopes to prove it can track people on the go as effectively as it searches for information on the Internet.The new software to be released Wednesday will enable people with mobile phones and other wireless devices to automatically share their whereabouts with family and friends.
The feature, dubbed ‘Latitude,’ expands upon a tool introduced in 2007 to allow mobile phone users to check their own location on a Google map with the press of a button. ‘This adds a social flavor to Google maps and makes it more fun,’ said Steve Lee, a Google product manager.”

More from Yahoo Tech.

• 	Posted by: Joe Keenan | 0 Comment(s)
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I was absolutely floored last week when my son mentioned he’d given out his cell phone number on the internet. We’d recently had the conversation about the dangers lurking on the web when I presented a program on internet safety to our middle school — so my brain couldn’t wrap itself around the fact that he blatantly went against the number one rule in our house for using the internet: NO PERSONAL INFORMATION is to be given out for ANY reason!

I was furious. I raised my voice in a manner reserved for serious offenses and felt panic well up inside my body.  What would have possessed him to be so careless?  What part of “grooming” (a term we’d discussed) did he not understand? (Grooming is when a predator will pretend to be whatever sex or age he needs to be in order to lure a child into trusting him so the child will reveal personal information.)  I took a deep breath and sat my son down for a long talk about how serious this situation could be.

This time, I was very specific about what can happen when personal information is revealed to someone he doesn’t know.  He was in a popular game room for younger children and told me he knew this person was a girl his age from England.  I asked him, “How do you know she is from England?”

“She told me she is.  She gave me her phone number too.”

“You didn’t call or text her, did you?”

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• 	Posted by: Tara Paterson | 3 Comment(s)
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Each day the first thing I ask my son as he walks through the door (after “how was your day?”) is whether he has homework.  Often he will say, “Yes, but it’s really easy.”  He has always been a child who handles his responsibilities so I have never had to come down on him about his school work — until now. 

Yesterday I received a phone call from his math teacher.  She assured me he is doing well on quizzes and tests — but has missed turning in the last two homework assignments. Hmmm, I thought to myself. 

So here I have made sure to ask him about his homework each day and he has confidently assured me he is doing it only to find out the contrary!  His teacher told me that they will have math homework everyday and that he should not be doing it in resource (our version of a study hall).  His teacher also shared that he verbally calculated what his grade would be having received a few 100s on some tests and quizzes combined with 0s on some homework assignments. 

I was on the phone when he first arrived home from school that day and to my surprise, when I came down the stairs, he was diligently doing his homework.  Before I could even spit out the words, “Guess who I talked to today…” he responded with “I know, I know.”  (More…)

• 	Posted by: Tara Paterson | 3 Comment(s)
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My son started middle school this past week and, wow, what a transformation has already taken place.  Friends with older children warned us of the changes we would see, but I had no idea they would happen so quickly.  The first few days all we heard about from our son was about every new girl he met and how he liked each one of them.  By the weekend, he asked me where his jeans were.

“Jeans?” I said. “You haven’t worn jeans in two years and the ones I bought you last year are way too short!”

“I like jeans now,” he said.

Oh boy did I want to string him up by his toes.  On the fourth day he lost his lunch box; I had to remind him numerous times to bring me the important forms I needed to sign; and breakfast is now eaten in a record 10 minutes so he can get to the bus stop to play football with the other neighborhood kids.  I gave him a cell phone so I can keep tabs on his busy schedule.  I resisted this for some time, but have come to believe that today’s children are virtually born with technology engrained in their little tween bodies, however, this is where it gets tricky and where we as parents need to stick together.

I decided the best way to keep myself informed about his new life, was to become involved in the PTO.  Rumors in our area have circled warning that parents quickly lose touch with their kids once they enter middle school.  With a student body of over 1200 kids (in only two grades) I can understand how this began, because up until last year it doesn’t appear there was an active parent-teacher network of communication.  How then does one remain in the loop with their rising tween?  Get involved.

We know from research that the tween years are critical years in our child’s life and the time most parents take their hands off the wheel.  What they didn’t learn in elementary school from the kids with older siblings, they are now going learn about on the bus, in the halls, and at lunch.

At our first PTO officer meeting, we deduced it’s not surprising to see more parents than students in the classrooms and hallways of the elementary schools, but by 6th grade parents are rarely seen in the hallways (unless they have been summoned by the administration for some inappropriate deed done by their child.)  Why is this?  Do most parents assume other parents will pick up the slack to meet the needs of their child too?  I don’t mean to be harsh, but this is the a critical time in our child’s journey to their teen years and the time when they begin to feel the pressure of their friends, the media and pop culture.  If parents aren’t aware or informed about what’s going on in their child’s daily life at school, they most likely won’t know what’s going on anywhere else either.

So how can you stay informed and connected with your child? Here are four tips for parenting tweens:

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• 	Posted by: Tara Paterson | 2 Comment(s)
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