Decoder - Breaking down teen culture, substance abuse, and parenting

August 2009 – Decoder - Breaking down teen culture, substance abuse, and parenting

“Top Party Schools” of 2009 Encourage Risky Drinking

Aug 28, 2009 by Joe Keenan | Categories Alcohol, Binge Drinking, College, Communicating, Culture, Drugs

Princeton Review has recently released its 2010 edition of The Best 371 Colleges, ranking American colleges and universities by almost every criterion possible, from knowledgeable professors to quality of dorm food. But despite the fact that nearly seventy lists are included in the guide, there is one list in particular that has students, parents, and college officials across the country talking: “Party Schools,” which ranks the top 20 party schools of 2009.

According to Princeton Review, the “party schools” are determined “based on a combination of survey questions [posed to students] concerning the use of alcohol and drugs, hours of study each day, and the popularity of the Greek system.” This year, Penn State topped the list, with the University of Florida and the University of Mississippi coming in second and third, respectively. Other drug- and alcohol-related lists in The Best 371 Colleges include “Lots of Beer,” “Lots of Hard Liquor,” and “Reefer Madness.”

While school officials aim for prestige, college kids’ responses to the rankings show that many students aspire to make the “Party Schools” list. From Facebook status updates to school newspaper articles, college students across the country have been expressing pride for being ranked – and disgust at not receiving a “Party School” title. “I’m really confused that UA isn’t at least on the list,” senior Sarah Kramm told the Crimson White, the University of Alabama’s official newspaper. “It’s like every night I’ll get texts and calls about all these different parties. Not to mention all of our bars are normally packed. It just doesn’t make sense to me.”

Can Princeton Review’s ratings pose a threat to college kids? Absolutely, writes Richard Yoast, Ph.D., director of the American Medical Association (AMA)’s Office of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Other Drug Abuse Prevention. The AMA, claiming that the party list “legitimiz[es] high-risk drinking,” has been lobbying Princeton Review for years to cease publishing this particular report. Yoast has been quoted as saying, “The Princeton Review should be ashamed to publish something for students and parents that fuels the false notion that alcohol is central to the college experience.”

Furthermore, a new study published in the Cochrane Library shows that college kids tend to drink as much as they believe their peers do – but they often overestimate how much alcohol their fellow students consume. “When a list such as ‘Party Schools’ or ‘Lots of Beer’ is published, it may inflate expectations by incoming students that ‘this is a big-time drinking school,’” explains Ken Winters, Ph.D., professor in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of Minnesota Medical School and a Senior Scientist at Treatment Research Institute. And having this type of perceived norm for drinking can encourage some individuals to drink more than if they held a more conservative view of the drinking norm at that school.”

“These rankings are not more than popularity contests,” Annemarie Mountz, spokesperson for number-one-rated Penn State, has said, noting that less than 1 percent of her university’s students participated in the Princeton Review survey, and that those who did participate were encouraged by their peers to boost Penn State’s partying reputation. “[The lists are] not connected to reality.”

So what if your kids are enrolled in the colleges on this year’s list? Dr. Winters suggests parents tell their kids the following: “Be smart. We don’t want you to make the list for ‘We Are Disappointed In You’ or ‘School Expulsion.’”

	Posted by: Joe Keenan \| 2 Comment(s)
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How To Tell If Your Teen Is Lying to You

Aug 27, 2009 by Vanessa Van Petten | Categories Advice, Communicating, Daughters, Marijuana, Monitoring, Sons, Teenagers

We all lie. For parents, it is important to tell if their teens are lying. After watching and interacting with thousands of teens, parents and families, I’ve compiled a list of clues for adults, teachers and parents to look out for:

(Disclaimer: the following is list of observations and does not always mean that the person you are speaking with is lying)

Verbal Cues
* Timing is off between gestures and words. The facial expression that comes after a statement (I am so sad about this, pause and then the sad expression)
* Less full facial expression when talking.
* Out of proportion reaction.
* Responds to questions, yet asks none of their own.
* When the subject is changed there is physical and emotional relief that you can see in the teen.

Body Language
* Less physical expression and movement. Stiffness or mechanical movement.
* The teen takes up less physical space (shrinking down in order not to be caught).
* Their hand may go up to his face or throat, especially to the mouth.
* They turn their body away from the adult or person they are lying to.
* Playing with physical objects or actually placing a physical object in between the two of you as a type of barrier.

Verbal Content
* Responding to an accusation by offering a belief in general instead of this specific instance (ie Do you smoke pot? -I believe pot is dangerous.)
* Constantly adding additional details until you believe them and to fill silences.
* They use such phrases as “To tell you the truth” “To be perfectly honest” and “Why would I lie to you?”
* The answer is very specific, almost rehearsed about a ‘casual event’
* They repeat your question.

To Catch A Lie
* Use an open-ended question that is not accusatory but alludes to a possible behavior: “Anything interesting happen at the party last night?”

* Ask their opinion on a similar example: “I would love your opinion on this. A friend of mine from college, recently found a lighter and some rolling papers in their child’s jeans. She is not sure how to approach it or if the papers were used for cigarettes or pot. What should she do?”

Lying is a very natural, yet dangerous occurrence. Unfortunately it is part of growing up, but parents need to be aware of teens lying habits to keep them safe. I share these tips and hope they will be used in the right circumstance.

	Posted by: Vanessa Van Petten \| 2 Comment(s)
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Make Like a Teen and Get Online!

Aug 6, 2009 by Vanessa Van Petten | Categories Advice, Communicating, Connecting, Culture, Internet, Monitoring, Pop Culture, Teenagers, Tweens

Last night I tried to teach my mom (love you!) how to download a song onto her iPod. It was a nightmare. Not just because I had to explain the concept of an iPod (and of downloading — at least music she understood), but also because of her fear and self-doubt that came along with it. Because I am a professional blogger, I teach people and companies about the Internet, technology and social networking all the time. I have come to realize that sometimes grown-ups are virtual kids and kids are virtual grown-ups!

Why I Think Adults are Virtually Immature and Kids are Virtually Grown-Up:

1) Learning to use a social network, such as Facebook, is like learning to ride a bike. If you learn it as a child, you are fearless, you try everything, it comes naturally and you have time to practice. But if you learn as an adult (I am still trying to learn how to ride a bike, so I know), it is scary. You think about how much it would hurt to fall, you do not practice as much, you feel stupid, you cannot get the gist of it as fast, and even when you do get going, you still feel nervous. With social networking, kids go through the learning process early and some are virtually grown-up by age 12!

2) Adults often have more fears than kids. Sure, tweens and teens could probably afford to use more caution, especially when it comes to the web, but the part of their brains that would make them worry about consequences hasn’t fully developed yet. Meanwhile, many adults I teach are too afraid of everything technological — pushing the wrong button, breaking something, or feeling “dumb,” “stupid,” or “pathetic” if they cannot get something right. Adults who are virtual kids have a lot of fear and kids who are virtual grown-ups are secure with their online selves.

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	Posted by: Vanessa Van Petten \| 0 Comment(s)
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This Week in Pop Culture: Promoting Underage Drinking

Aug 5, 2009 by Joe Keenan | Categories Alcohol, Binge Drinking, Celebrities, College, Communicating, Culture, Drugs, General, High School, Illegal Activity, Internet, Middle School, Movies, Pop Culture, Prescription Medicine/Rx Drugs, Role Models, Teenagers, Television, Tweens

As a father of two teens, I know it’s impossible to shield our kids from messages that promote underage drinking. That said, it’s always nice to be given a heads-up so we know just who and what in pop culture may be negatively influencing our kids – and right now in particular, I think you’ll be surprised to find out some of the sources sending pro-drinking messages to our teenagers. Here’s a quick round-up of where our kids have been seeing and hearing “cool” alcohol-related messages lately:

Tweens and younger teens: The latest Harry Potter movie. If you think I’m kidding, check out this article from the New York Times, which cites a number of scenes in which our favorite young wizards, only about 16, drink “butterbeer” and appear to get drunk.

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	Posted by: Joe Keenan \| 6 Comment(s)
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